Missing Scenes: Failure
by QueenHimiko
Summary: After Lina rescues Gourry from Hellmaster, Gourry has to re-evaluate his utility to her and their relationship. Novels continuity, right after "King of the City of Ghosts."


**AN: I do not own** _ **The Slayers,**_ **I just play in the sandbox.**

Gourry opened his eyes and found himself in a strange blue room. How had he gotten here? And why had he been taken? He tried to move, but he was being held in place. When he looked down to see what was holding him his terror mounted as he saw a gelatinous blue material crawling up his legs.

He had to escape! He had to get back to Lina! But try as he willed his body it wouldn't move!

The blue stuff was up to his neck now. The swordsman felt of well of sorrow open within him. Surely the blue stuff would kill him. He would never see Lina again. He wouldn't be able to help her. He'd failed her.

Gourry sat up in bed, gasping for air. Slowly he calmed down, the sites of yet another strange inn reassuring. Yes, the events in the dream had happened. But he was safe now. And he had seen Lina again. He took a moment to collect himself and gather his bearings, sorting through what was real and what wasn't. He still didn't understand why he was taken in the first place, or how Lina had got him back, but she had managed it. And for some reason, even though the Sword of Light had been lost, she was still traveling with him.

Or she said she would yesterday.

They'd spent the day talking about where to find a new, powerful sword. As soon as they got into town they'd bought regular one, had dinner, and then found an inn to crash in. As soon as his head had hit the pillow Gourry had been out. He realized he hadn't even checked on Lina, and closed his eyes and listened for her presence in the next room, and was dismayed when he couldn't hear her. Perhaps she had already gone down for breakfast?

He got out of bed and started to dress. Of course, if she left him in the night he couldn't blame her. It was as she had said when they first rescued him. He'd let that little kid abduct him. What a poor guardian he'd turned out to be. Lina had likely had to put herself in even more danger to get him back. That wasn't the way it should have worked.

Shame coursed through him as he laced up his boots. What could he do right? He couldn't keep his family from killing each other for a sword. He couldn't keep Lina safe. And now he was just a swordsman with an average sword. How was he going to be able to help Lina do the impossible now? How could he help her without just being more of a burden?

He wouldn't blame her if she left. He'd be crushed, but he couldn't blame her.

He left his room and swiftly went down the stairs, nearly crashing into a weary looking traveler in his haste to get there. Gourry made it to the dining room, and let go of a breath he was holding as he saw Lina sitting at a table by the window spreading some jam on a piece of toast, looking unusually weary. She looked up when he entered the room, and relief washed through her features.

He suddenly felt a bit silly. He must have looked like he was rushing, and he was a bit winded. He did his best to be as casual as possible as he took a seat beside her. "Morning, Sunshine." He said, and he practically had to sit on his hands to keep himself from reaching out and running a hand through her long chestnut hair. How his palms itched to touch her!

For some reason her eyes seemed to fill, and she blinked quickly as she took a deep breath. When she spoke, her voice was a bit constrained, "Look who's finally awake!"

"You weren't worried, were you?"

"Of course I was. Worried about having to come into your room and drag your ass down to breakfast." She said.

A waitress came at that moment, and Gourry placed his order. An awkward moment passed after she left. On the one hand, Gourry wanted to know why he was taken by that little boy and how Lina had gotten him back, and just how much time had passed. But he was also embarrassed. And he didn't exactly want to call more attention to the fact that he was no longer the powerful ally to her that he once was than he had to.

"Wow, fresh strawberries!" Gourry commented as the waitresses brought out the pancakes. "Isn't it a bit early, though?"

"Not really." Lina said as she polished her plate, "You were gone for nearly a month."

Gourry set his fork down, "A month?" he repeated.

Lina looked away from him and out the window. He wondered what she was thinking. If she was mad at him for not putting up a fight. For making her have to come and rescue him. For losing the Sword of Light.

He decided he couldn't dodge the question any longer, "But why did he take me in the first place?"

Lina took a deep breath and looked at the table, "He wanted me to perform that spell, the big one."

Lina didn't have to specify which one. He knew she was talking about the one she'd used to take down Shabranigdu. While he enjoyed teasing her, keeping track of her spells was important for assisting her on the battlefield. "The one that could destroy the world." he stated.

"That's what he wanted to happen." Lina confirmed.

The bottom seemed to drop from his stomach as the events of the past few months started to make sense. Horror grew within him as he realized just how badly they had been played. But something else also unsettled him. If that was what Hellmaster wanted, why did she even come to rescue him in the first place?

"But, what we're you thinking? Going after me when he wanted that?" he asked harshly.

Annoyance crossed her features, "If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have been in any danger!" she spat, "I couldn't just let him keep you."

Gourry blinked, and wondered if perhaps she wasn't as mad at him as he feared she was, and if what she really felt was guilt. But before he could think too much on it she continued, "Besides, I'd pulled that spell off twice without magical amplification, so I sure as hell could do it with amplification!" She explained, "So I did, I won, Hellmaster's gone and he won't be bothering us anymore."

He had the feeling she was leaving something out, but as she sipped her juice he decided to let it go. He was too familiar with carrying baggage he didn't want to discuss, and the last thing he wanted to do was the build resentment by prying into things she wasn't ready to talk about. He picked up his knife and fork and cut into his pancakes and thought about what she said. Unobtrusively he watched as she sat her glass down, her expression unusually somber so that it tugged on his heart strings and he fumbled for a way to make her feel better. Even before he was kidnapped he knew the past few months had been hard on her. Powerful people wanted her dead, and had nearly succeeded several times. He wondered how she had weathered the past month.

Had she been wrecked with guilt over his abduction? Judging by her countenance that seemed likely. Had she been broken hearted? His heart accelerated at the thought. He briefly flirted with the idea of wooing her. She looked like she could use distraction from the weight she had carried for the past few months. And he desperately wanted her. But as soon as the thought crossed his mind he discarded it. He had seen what had happened to people who found love while emotionally vulnerable. While their love burned brightly, the flame was short lived.

He wanted to be with Lina for the rest of his life. So he had to make sure the foundation was in place so that their love was a slow but steady burn.

So he resolved to keep things friendly until he found a sword that was a worthy replacement for the Sword of Light (certainly that would give them both enough time to heal emotionally). And in the meantime, he had to do something about the fact that she seemed teetering close to tears. He smiled as he chewed his pancakes, swallowed and said, "So, you say I'd been gone about a month."

"Yes." She answered.

"Did you miss me?" he asked casually.

She turned red, "What?"

"Did you miss me?" he asked.

"You wish!" she said as she threw a breakfast roll at him.

He smiled. It still didn't change the fact that his usefulness as an ally was greatly undermined, but at least he could still take her mind off of her troubles. He bet he could even still make her laugh. And considering all that she had just been through, if he could still do those things, then he wasn't completely useless to her.


End file.
